no more lies?

why couldn't he just tell me the truth?
it hurts more when you suddenly find out that "oh it's a lie"
ouch! it hurts so much...
why does he has to deny it?
my gosh....fooled again...
this is what i hate when my brain is working...
because i discover everything...and it all just hit and hurt me...
i can't believe it...
he's done it again...
please no more lies?

what to feel?

all the while, i thought i was important to him..
but now, i realized that i'm just not...
i don't know or maybe of only little importance...
it came directly from his mouth...
that he doesn't really prioritize me...
should i get hurt for that?
well, i dunno...but it hit me...
he said sorry for not giving me what i want...
he said sorry because he can't give me those simple things...
and i was like..
"do you always have to do something because i want you to do that?"
"don't you ever do something for me because you also want it?"
"is it always what i want? couldn't it be what you also want?"
i mean...what would you feel if you guys were in my situation?
isn't it hurting that you'll realize that you're getting what you want in the expense of others?
isn't it hurting to realize that he's just doing that for you not to be angry with him?
is it always gonna be me?
i'm always the one who makes the move...
all he has to do is follow it...
he always says, "i'll try"
but in fact, he doesn't...
he's just taking me for granted...
i dunno...i so hate him for that....
he doesn't even know what it feels like...
i hope we could exchange positions...
geez! am i selfish for feeling this way?
well....i'm quite confused...
i'll just forget this incident...
and him might as well...

yah ryt!

so, you'll gonna try huh?
i just thought you were going to...
but...yah! you were online awhile ago...
but you didn't even tell me...
i was waiting coz i thought i asked you to go online yesterday...
but you never informed me...
thanks a lot!
i'm so pissed...
i don't wanna talk to you...